Foiled by Font: A Distressingly Funny Incident

I woke up expecting to have a lovely writing day, only to open my email from the book buyer who will be ordering copies of my book for an upcoming bookstore event. The email opened:

It is a real horror to have you at (bookstore) to speak about your book “Wind Thief “.

I read the email a few more times to make sure my eyes had seen correctly. I thought, Gads, but some people have no talent for written communications. I envisioned an overworked, under-paid man who dealt mostly with numbers and rarely got out of a small, cramped office. A chagrined data man tired of working with artsy, moody, pain in the tuchus authors. Then I had a good laugh, because really, even if outrageous, the message was highly entertaining, and how often is email entertaining?

I adopted what I hoped was a gosh, what a strange thing to say, but let's get on with the business arrangements tone while writing a response to the man:

Wow! That's impressively negative, but what I assume you mean is that arranging to get my book is more of a hassle than getting books through a main distributor. Fortunately I have a one-phone-call solution for you...

Still unable to believe the situation, I sent the original email to my husband and began shaking the moment I read his response:

I don't see the word 'horror.'

I rechecked the book buyer's email and sure enough, where I'd read "the horror" — three times in a row — I looked closer and realized the word was "honor."

He was honored to have me at the bookstore!

To which my husband, ever brilliant in supplying an appropriately literary response, quipped:

The horror.

So true!

The moral of the story?

Get a new email font where the "n" doesn't look like two "r"s mashed together.

(You'll be happy to know the book buyer is a lovely person with a good sense of humor and a forgiving heart.)

Happy writing!

Beat That: The Contest Game

About three weeks ago during an online chat for my character development class, one of the participants asked a great question:

What do you think of writing contests?

I gave a noncommittal answer, but upon reflection, realized my play, Frozen, or Dead?, had been produced in 1998 because I'd submitted the two-person drama to a contest. My entry earned semifinalist status, giving me a great writing credential for my resume. But the secondary and more important payoff was that one of the judges was also an actor who decided to produce the play as a vehicle to showcase his acting ability, thus awarding me exposure, as well.

The topic jumped up again two days ago when Christy Longmire (featured in the photo), a past workshop participant and romance writer who writes under the pseudonym of Savannah Foxx, wrote me with the good news that she'd entered the Between the Sheets Unpublished Writer Contest, hosted by the Greater Detroit Romance Writers of America:

...and I finale-ed! I'm really excited. It's my first entry and I was really only hoping to get some good feedback but I got that and then some!... I really worked hard on it so it's a motivator to keep going.

In turn, Christy has motivated me to name all the reasons contests are a good thing I'd encourage writers to try:


Reasons to Enter Writing Contests

1. Mind candy

Contests are usually fun. You send in your entry and then for several weeks or months get the pleasure of envisioning yourself in a grand ballroom at the announcer says, "And the winner is..." when all of a sudden, the spotlight shines on you and the announcer calls your name! The applause! The cameras! The glory! The million-dollar contract with a major publisher!

I don't know about you, but for $0 to $20, you can't beat the price of such a delicious, long-lasting fantasy, which has a much better chance of turning into reality than does playing the lottery.

2. Future Support for the Writing Addicted

By sending in those contest checks, we writers support countless publications, publishers and writing organizations that would have folded a decade ago when Everything Went Online and subscriptions became passe.

That financial support ensures that we writers continue to have loads of places to send our material.

3. Bootcamp

Entering contests teaches us discipline. Specifically, we learn to meet deadlines; read and follow submission guidelines; and properly format and edit our manuscripts. Even if we don't win, we learn real-world hup-to stuff that readies us for the rigors of submitting to agents and publishers.

4. Exposure

Agents and publishers frequently act as contest judges and/or choose contest winners as clients. Even if the contest is small, the credit adds weight to your resume, which in turn can influence an agent or publisher's decision.


Two Tips

As I've said in previous posts, the smaller contests generally have fewer entrants who are typically beginner- to intermediate-level writers, thus increasing your chances of winning.

I'd also encourage you to determine how much you want to spend per year on contest entry fees, since the total can climb quickly. If you see yourself exceeding the limit, consider attending Writing Contest Addicts Anonymous. If you feel the need to Google the group, which doesn't exist, you might be a good candidate to found the organization.


A Few Helpful Resources

• FreelanceWriting.com and NewPages.com keep ongoing, updated list of contests.

• Writer's Digest offers writing contests throughout the year.

If you've got any inspiring contest stories to offer, or tips to divulge, please do!

Happy writing!